Motivational Videos: Whatever It Takes by Lifehouse and Lead Me by Sanctus Real

Today as I was listening to the radio, I heard this song called, “Whatever It Takes” by Lifehouse. It made me think of my own situation and many of my friends’ situations.

Lifehouse – Whatever It Takes

Lifehouse’s “Whatever It Takes” Lyrics:

A strangled smile fell from your faceIt kills me that I hurt you this wayThe worst part is that I didn’t even knowNow there’s a million reasons for you to goBut if you can find a reason to stayI’ll do whatever it takesTo turn this aroundI know what’s at stakeI know that I’ve let you downAnd if you give me a chanceBelieve that I can changeI’ll keep us together whatever it takesShe said “If we’re gonna make this workYou gotta let me inside even though it hurtsDon’t hide the broken parts that I need to see”She said “Like it or not it’s the way it’s gotta beYou gotta love yourself if you can ever love me”I’ll do whatever it takesTo turn this aroundI know what’s at stakeI know that I’ve let you downAnd if you give me a chanceAnd give me a breakI’ll keep us together, I know you deserve much betterBut remember the time I told you the way that I feltThat I’d be lost without you and never find myselfLet’s hold onto each other above everything elseStart over, start overI’ll do whatever it takesTo turn this aroundI know what’s at stakeI know I’ve let you downAnd if you give me a chanceand believe that I can changeI’ll keep us together whatever it takes

Then it reminded me of the Sanctus Real song, “Lead Me,” which encourages husbands to fight for their wives and family through leadership. While it is not about the guy who struggles with pornography specifically, it is still powerful. The most important part is where it says: “”

Show me you’re willing to fightThat I’m still the love of your lifeI know we call this our homeBut I still feel alone

And where the man commits to that plea and with the realization that he has the same plea as his wife and kids, he himself pleas for help:

I’ll show them I’m willing to fightAnd give them the best of my lifeSo we can call this our homeLead me, ’cause I can’t do this aloneFather, lead me, ’cause I can’t do this alone

Sanctus Real “Lead Me” Lyrics:

I look around and see my wonderful lifeAlmost perfect from the outsideIn picture frames I see my beautiful wifeAlways smilingBut on the inside, I can hear her saying…“Lead me with strong handsStand up when I can’tDon’t leave me hungry for loveChasing dreams, what about us?Show me you’re willing to fightThat I’m still the love of your lifeI know we call this our homeBut I still feel alone”I see their faces, look in their innocent eyesThey’re just children from the outsideI’m working hard, I tell myself they’ll be fineThey’re independentBut on the inside, I can hear them saying…“Lead me with strong handsStand up when I can’tDon’t leave me hungry for loveChasing dreams, but what about us?Show me you’re willing to fightThat I’m still the love of your lifeI know we call this our homeBut I still feel alone”So Father, give me the strengthTo be everything I’m called to beOh, Father, show me the wayTo lead themWon’t You lead me?To lead them with strong handsTo stand up when they can’tDon’t want to leave them hungry for love,Chasing things that I could give upI’ll show them I’m willing to fightAnd give them the best of my lifeSo we can call this our homeLead me, ’cause I can’t do this aloneFather, lead me, ’cause I can’t do this alone

Other great videos:

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Logos for Mac

Logos Bible Software is giving away thousands of dollars of prizes to celebrate the launch of Logos Bible Software 4 Mac on October 1. Prizes include an iMac, a MacBook Pro, an iPad, an iPod Touch, and more than 100 other prizes!

They’re also having a special limited-time sale on their Mac and PC base packages and upgrades. Check it out!

My First Church Experience

Talk to any minister or pastor or elder of any church and they will tell you that their church has issues. Probably one of the greatest tragedies of the pastorship is church mutiny or rebellion. I once heard T. D. Jakes (while I disagree with him theologically, I respect the man as a leader) say to a group of leaders, “We all have a Judas sitting at the table with us.” Chuck Swindoll, Sr. Pastor of Stonebriar Community Church and Chancellor of Dallas Seminary, once said, “If there is any other profession that you can do other than the pastorate, do it.” This from a beloved pastor, a great pastor, a good teacher, President Emeritus of Dallas Seminary, a great seminary that produces solid, biblical, expositional/exegetical pastors. However, Swindoll would never tell anyone who was called to be a pastor that they should not pastor. Instead Swindoll simply means that if your conscience before God can live without blemish or trouble or guilt or shame and do something other than the pastorate, do it. However, if one is compelled by God and will only deteriorate doing something else, they should pastor. So what does Swindoll know that make him say this? Simply, the highest causality in churches is that we shoot our own. Maybe Swindoll had this in mind or what Jakes said or something else, when he said that. Simply, many pastors are wounded, beaten, hit, and then they are “killed” while they are down. Though they live, their passion is gone. Their heart is broken. Their spirits are weakened. They are lost, drifting, sinking, or dead.

Not knowing this, full of zeal and spirit and some truth, I entered “ministry.” I transferred to a Bible College. I had a great experience at my former college church founded by someone who went to a Bible College. That church was unique, vibrant, healthy, and good! Let me give you two examples of that church. First, one day the pastor sent out an email about a member of the church, a college student (being a college church, about 80-90% of the congregation were college students). He just received a call that one of his parents was deathly ill and that he had no money (nor did his family) to fly him back. So the email came. Within the hour, the guy had more than enough funds, a ticket to Seattle, and a ride to the airport. Amazing! The second was during church. Instead of an offering plate (which was normally a felt bag of sorts), a wooden offering plate full of $5 bills was passed. We were to take money out or let it pass. We were encouraged to take money for ourselves or for someone close to us (roommate, etc) that needed it, but we couldn’t take more than $50. And this happened fairly regularly! Wow!

Well, I came back to the church that was responsible for my conversion upon my transfer to a Bible College. I began to be discipled by the Sr. Pastor, for his name sake and protection let’s call him Ken. Ken agreed to meet with me weekly while I was at Bible College to teach me about communication, preaching, hermeneutics, etc. It was great. I traveled with him to speak at various places. I attended church meetings (deacon meetings, elder meetings, leadership meetings) and was becoming actively involved in the leadership myself. Everything seemed to be going well. While my memory is not the best as far as what happened chronologically, several things happened and they happened fairly quickly. First, Ken missed a couple (maybe even several) meetings. I remember one in particularly that was scheduled and re-scheduled at a local Waffle House. I arrived on time and ready to chat; however, he never showed up. I called his cell and got no answer. I called the church and got no answer. Nothing. From that moment forward, he began to ignore me. He failed to return my calls, emails, etc., which normally were returned. I could not and did not understand what happened. Surely Ken felt betrayed by the church and pushed people away.

A bit later, the church went through a massive church split. I was asked by both sides to come on staff as the youth minister (the side that the youth pastor did not choose) or the college minister (the side that the youth pastor did choose). I was frightened and shocked that a church could do this. Believing that both sides were at fault somehow in some way, I walked away. Broken, confused, churchless (which felt like homelessness), I wondered. From here I have struggled with churches ever since. I was never told why the church split and still to this day I have no idea what happened. I have also never been to get back in touch with Ken for whatever reason.

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Interesting Review of Celebrate Recovery

I have read and re-read and thought about a review of Celebrate Recovery (CR) I recently found at Provision House. It is a “non-profit, 501(c)(3), non-residential addictions ministry that helps Christians find freedom from addiction in Christ and helps churches understand addiction from an emphatically biblical perspective” located in Charlotte, NC with a generic evangelical statement of faith.

Operating his own addiction ministry, Paul is knowledgeable in the area of addiction. While his review is not entirely negative, he is not positive towards CR as well. When I first started reading it, as any faithful CR person, I became offended; however, I have thought many of the same thoughts that Paul Stark brings up. As a short summary, let me raise his main arguments against Celebrate Recovery. In no particular order, here are his objections or reservations, as I understand him.

  1. He writes, “One particularly troubling practice is the curriculum’s pervasive use of Bible paraphrases.”
  2. Lack of Romans 6 Theology, or does CR subscribe to the thought, “once an addict, always an addict”?
  3. No explanation/teaching on temptation.
  4. Implicit, or even explicit, coercion of CR that everyone is in denial and playing God (powerless).
  5. Inadequate explanation of Christian service, esp. outside CR.
  6. Impractical tools to avoid temptation.
  7. CR Rule “No Cross Talk” is problematic and the parallel wording. Mr. Stark writes, “All participants are viewed identically, as helpless children [who require clear and simple instructions under parental supervision], all with the same relational, personality, and spiritual problems”
  8. The idea that the further one plunges into oblivion the greater the likelihood of discovering a resource to break free is naïve, yet sometimes implicitly encouraged, and risks that participants will accelerate the plunge in an attempt to reach this point sooner.

I believe that some of these are valid and need to be discussed. To his credit, Paul Stark has tried to contact CR to no avail. So I will attempt to continue the discussion. For me the four biggest (in no particular order) are (1) one’s version of the Bible, (2) Lack of Romans 6 Theology, (3) Lack of Teaching on Temptation, Christian Service, and Sanctification, and (4) CR Rule “No Cross Talk” (which can be coupled with #3 in a solution). Since Paul Stark makes a big deal about Denial and Powerlessness, I will discuss it briefly.

Paraphrase: Is it a big deal?

So really, what is the big deal about CR’s use of a paraphrase? First, let me say that, any Bible, whether translation or paraphrase, is better than no Bible. Second, one should always study from a Bible that is a translation. Believe it or not, we all believe words are a big deal! For example, how many times have you heard someone say, “The Bible says ALL so it means ALL” (for example, Romans 3:23). That’s only one word, and if that one word is that important, then isn’t every word important? Jesus himself said that the Bible is important down to the dot of an “i” though he said it referring to the Hebrew’s jot and tittle (Matt 5:18). If we believe that the Bible is inspired down to its very words, then why depend on a paraphrase of the actual words? Why not read something that attempts to stay true to the meaning of the original Hebrew and Greek?

So, I strongly agree and reiterate the comment that Paul Stark makes: “One particularly troubling practice is the curriculum’s pervasive use of Bible paraphrases.” To me, this is of extreme importance. I have asked around why CR does this, and I have come to the following conclusion. First, it is the style of Saddleback and Rick Warren. Second, the audience of most recovery-addiction places are believed to be Bible illiterate (whether it is true or not). Third, traditionally, AA and other recovery-addiction places use and encourage the use of paraphrases. However, it should be noted that many paraphrases, even the much beloved The Message Bible, is just that: a paraphrase. So as not to reinvent the wheel, let me quote Paul Stark,

For example, Mark 1:15 is quoted, “Turn from your sins and act on this glorious news

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  • Ok, stopped at a gas station today, and saw some porn mags. First gas station in a while I’ve seen it. Very tempted. Sucessful! #
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Devotion: John 5:1-17

Rich Mullins, a famous Christian musician, said, “People don’t read the Bible to know stuff; they read it to know God.” So I wondered what I was doing. I did start off to know God. I got a Bible College education because I wanted to know God. However, something happened. Something changed. There was a slow fade into knowledge about rather than a knowledge of. So I began reading John 5 specifically asking, “How does this apply to me?” something I rarely do. Usually I begin with the exegetical process of observation and interpretation rarely having time for the application much less correlation (if this means nothing just keep going).

So in John 5, Jesus approaches Bethesda, where there are many sick people, who sit there doing the same thing again and again watching the pools hoping that one day it would change them. But there was nothing. So Jesus speaks to a man who had been ill for 38 years. How long have I been in my condition and bondage to pornography? I’ve been stuck for about 17 years. It’s deep. It’s wide. It’s ugly. Then Jesus asked a pointed question: “Do you wish to get well?” Do I? Do I really wish to get well? Do I desire in the depths of my heart to be free from my porn addiction? Where does my heart lay? How would I respond to this question? How DO I respond to this question? Even trembling, weary, utterly sad, guilt-ridden, I do.

The man replies with an answer that he does but he needs help because others beat him to the punch. So Jesus replied, “Get up, pick up your mate and walk.” There’s the command. Does the man feel better? Does he feel different? Does he know something is different? Does he peer into the eyes of Jesus with doubt, confusion, or glee? Verse 9 then says, “Immediately!” Immediately. Can I be healed immediately? Or is it just a process? Does this text promise me immediate healing? I’d be lying if I said it did. I does not. Nor does the text say that he healed everyone there (but then again it doesn’t say he didn’t for John later writes that he couldn’t write about everything that happened which suggests that he could have, and possibly did). Verse 9 continues, “the man became well, and picked up his palley and began to walk.” It was a fact that Jesus healed the man apart from the man’s faith. We, through faith, have been set free from our bondage to pornography, but do we want to be healed? While the passage’s main thrust is Jesus’ ministry of healing, the question that is posed to us all is: “Do you wish to get well?” Do I? Do you?

There are three basic responses to this. First, one can say “Yes.” Second, one can say, “No.” And finaly one can ignore the question or say, “I don’t know.” This last response which has been mine for some time is the most dangerous with its passivity. We can easily rationale that we did not answe, “No.” But in failing to say, “Yes,” we say, “No.” So what will your answer be? What is mine? I say YES! ten times over again. Lord, will you heal me?

The Love of God

I went to this Christian training institute, and I roomed with a guy from Arizona State University who became a dear friend of mine. One day we came into our hotel suite room after a long day of classes (8 to 5). He threw himself on his bed and said, “I think I’ll just let God love on me.” He then closed his eyes and went sleep, I think. I stood there in shock. I didn’t know what to do with that, so I left. So what does it mean to let God love on you, on me?

I still don’t have the slightest idea. I know all the theological answers like “God so loved the world that He gave His one and only begotten son” (John 3:16) or “While we were yet sinners Christ died for us’ ” (Rom 5:8). But what does that mean? What does it mean to let God love on me? What does it mean to receive His love?

So, I turned to the only sources I know. What does it mean to receive the love of my wife or my dad? Even that is extremely difficult for me. Do I even receive it? Do I ever think about it? I don’t. I take it for granted. Their love, frankly, means nothing to me. I just know they love me. It’s a cognitive thing. And if it means nothing, then have I really received it? Why is love such a blank slate for me? What do I want?

What did Rich Mullins mean when he called the Love of God “the wreckless raging fury?” Was he referring to God’s self abandonment to do whatever it takes to get us back? Was he referring to His divine jealousy? Or is God’s love angry or wrathful? I doubt it. I believe that he is referring to God’s zeal and fervor for those whom He loves. But what does that mean for me?

So what does it mean to be loved, to be intimate? It means being accepted. It is being fully known and being received as is. It is having gifts lavished onto me; gifts that I both need and want. It is being receive AS IS with no warranty and desparately broken. It means allowing oneself to be accepted.

As I write about this I have no emotional response, which I am so desparately trying to pull. Here’s what I believe love is for me. Every time I watch movies, especially good dramas, I am torn up inside. Take Rudy for example. I was all torn up by the team’s action when they all gave up their jersey for him. If in a room alone, I would cry, but I usually don’t let myself. That’s love.

For some reason, I have a merit based idea of love. If I haven’t done anything to earn someone’s love, then is it love? Can it be received and experienced? My wife tells me over and over that she loves me. She tells me that not leaving me, which is her heart’s desire, is loving me. I am not so sure. Can just actions apart from feelings/emotion be love? If she doesn’t want to stay, which is what I think, then is she loving me by staying? I know I don’t receive it as such. Just as she doesn’t receive many of thew things I do as love.

But there is more. It also means that He doesn’t just leave me where I am. He doesn’t leave me in my waste. He brings me along and begins to help me, chasten me, discipline me, and restore me. This part I know I don’t care so much for. I am a fool for despising this, I know. But seriously who likes being disciplined? I know some may say, “It reminds me that I belong to God as a legitimate child,” but seriously my rebelliousness really hates this.

I’ve heard it said again and again, but first in THE RAGAMUFFIN GOSPEL by Brenan Manning, “There is nothing you can do to make God love you less and there is nothing you can do to make God love you more.” I know this but have I felt this? Have I allowed myself to feel loved and accepted by God? God cannot be pushed away unlike people. No matter what I do I cannot push him out of my life. He’s there. But he isn’t just there. He’s there for me. He is there to support me. But I just leave him with his unrequitted love, yet he remains. I continue down my insane path of sin, death, and destruction worshipping at its alter, yet He loves me the same. How? Why? Even when I did good thing after good thing to build myself on a pedastool, He loved me the same. How? Why?

I have done nothing to earn his love and attention, so why does he plague me with it? I know I want nothing more than His love so why do I kick against it? Why do I push and shove Him around and try to remove Him from my life? Won’t He just leave and let me be right? No! He remains.

I have been fighting God for at least 9 years, and I got a feeling that I am about to end up like Jacob did when He wrestled with the angel of the Lord. I got a feeling that He’s going to body-slam me one more time, and I hope he sticks around because He’ll need to put me back together.

I’ve had more and more conversations where I feel that I am going to have an emotional meltdown, but somehow I am able to stop it. Somehow I am able to put myself back together again and move forward.

So I am excited yet scared to death of God and His love. Just as CS Lewis said in the Chronicles of Narnia, “No, he’s not safe, but He’s good.” I have no problems with the first part, but I doubt the second part. He may be good, but is He good as I define good? And yet that is problematic because theologically can abyone define good better than God? Oh dear!

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