8 Core Feelings and Their Associated State of Beings

One thing that I have noticed in my meetings whether group or 12-step, I have noticed that there is a lack of understanding of feelings and associated state of beings. At first, I didn’t have a clue about this and would constantly pass off states of being as my feelings; however, this chart was given to me and it has made a world of difference in order to understand my core feelings. As I continue to learn about my own personal feelings, I wanted to share it with everyone else.

When I was at Bethesda Workshops, one of the leaders said, “One thing we want you to learn is that no feeling in and of themselves is a bad feeling.” My objections to this statement were the feelings of GUILT and SHAME. While I can actually see how GUILT can be a positive feeling in the sense of CONVICTION, GODLY SORROW, etc., I still have some difficulty seeing how SHAME is a “positive” feeling, especially since I have always defined SHAME as seeing myself as inadequate or unworthy (as even some of the state of beings indicate). However, if we define it as something like a “state of dishonor” or even humility (if that is an emotion or feeling?), then I can see shame positively. However, I typically don’t see it as positive and will probably continue struggling with this for some time. What do you think? Can SHAME be a positive feeling?

CORE FEELINGS            ASSOCIATED STATE OF BEING



 

GLAD Loving, content, compassionate, relieved, excited, alive, joyful, satisfied, calm, peaceful, accepted, committed, understood, strong, healthy, encouraged, determined, patient, respected, confident, competent, important, whole, valued, secure, worthy
SAD Depressed, exhausted, overwhelmed, frantic, abandoned, trapped, desperate, hopeless, victimized, criushed, empty, miserable, fragile, helpless, needy, used, lonely, disappointed, remorseful, misunderstood, upset
ANGER Offended, irritated, agitated, cross, provoked, uptight, impatient, disagreeable, disgusted, displeased, annoyed, bothered, critical, furious, enraged, hostile, vengeful, aggressive, hateful, indifferent
GUILT Regretful, alienated, worthless, humiliated, inadequate, disgraced, despised, failure, bad, embarrassed, stupid, tormented
LONELY Sad, alone, not chosen, abandoned, isolated, alienated, victimized, worthless, dejected, empty, friendless, needy, tearful
FEAR Terrified, shocked, panicky, desperate, frantic, vulnerable, tense, anxious, apprehensive, suspicious, perturbed, unsafe, cowardly, timid, concerned, undecided, uneasy, pressured
SHAME Ashamed, abused, helpless, humiliated, worthless, rejected, abandoned, detested, inadequate, degraded, unloved, failure, unimportant, bad, weak, ungifted, ugly, ignored, inferior
HURT Hopeless, rejected, defeated, desperate, victimized, worthless, wounded, degraded, crushed, miserable, sick, torn up, fragile, destroyed

 

Comments

  1. Sara says

    8 core feelings and only 1 is positive?? really? that alone has deflated my hopes to find relief from this hopelessness… lol (not really lol)

Leave a Reply